Life is a psychological war fare that quite frankly – in most probability we will never win! I don’t know how many of you are going to meet up with friends, family and foes this festive season, but for those of us who in particularly are going to come into contact with the foes (family included!), these interactions can be somewhat less joyous than the festivities happening all around us! So, it is safe to say that we need all the backup we can get!
With this in minds, I thought I would share some of my strategies that help me make it through these trying (and I saying this with intensity of labor pains) times. Please bear in mind that these strategies are not always going to work, but heck they have kept me out of police custody, so I might as well just share them with you!
The first most obvious to those who actually have the option (which is rarely the case) is to not come into physical contact with these members of society- avoid them at all costs!. Send a message with a family member, an elf , a Christmas card or email, just avoid actually being in the same room with the person who rubs you up the wrong way.
If you are unable to avoid this person or these people, then prior mental preparation is required! Prepare yourself for all the horrific things that are bound to be said or done that will unleash violent thoughts in your head, once you have all these summarized, digest them and let them go. Doing this will lessen the blow when the actual event takes place!
Practice keeping your mouth shut– literally practice breathing through your nostrils (without flaring them!)
Write down every fault you can identify about yourself , and every other fault or weakness you can remember anyone ever saying about you – either to your face or behind your back ( it doesn’t matter!), if you cry while writing this list you obviously have serious issues , but this is not the point right now (remember you are not the only one that feels inadequate, it’s part of being human!). Once you have written this list, read it and smile. Practice smiling while reading these hurtful things that you think might be true! That way when you eventually hear them , you can put that smile into effect!
Listen to a song that brings out your alter ego– (alter egos are usually stronger versions of ourselves) just before you go into the red zone! This usually helps me mentally, but be careful to not go into “poke mode” where you are out there just waiting for a reason to unleash yourself!
Summon your inner Ally McBeal . If in direct contact , phase your mind out and use your imagination to transform the other party into anything your brain can whip up eg. a cup, a cotton candy elephant, Miley Cyrus – whatever! Just imagine that that person is now in your chosen form and keep on smiling!
Limit the amount of alcohol intake in the presence of these people if you are one of those people who become lets say… volatile under the influence!
Increase the amount of alcohol intake in the presence of these people if you are one of those people who experience the calming effects from let’s say a glass of wine (have multiple glasses if need be! Hahahaha!) . Chances are you have already been labelled, so live up to their expectations!
Compliment the foe/s, I don’t care what it is- just find something even if it’s the shape of their cuticles and say something nice about it. Compliments usually help to reduce level of destruction that the foe intends for you! (Not saying elimate, no…just reduce!)
I know that these are not for all, but I hope that there is at least something that everyone can take from this – even if it’s just a smile.